“You have hypothyroidism, oh wait…no you don’t”

I’ve decided to become an open book….after all, we’re all human and we all have our own story. Our moments of victory and triumph as well as our tragedies and our traumas. Moments of great health and moments of illness. My story is inconclusive, messy, confusing and a rough one. Due to past trauma, I’ve battled depression and anxiety. The two have sat on my shoulders for almost 10 years now – dictating my life to no avail. It’s been an exhausting road, with a plethora of bumps and dead ends. I received therapy for my depression and anxiety for several years and overall, it helped me a great deal. However, there still were moments where it consumed every part of my being – leaving me unable to get out of bed and face the day.

I’ve always had problems with easy weight gain, sluggishness, brain fog, exhaustion and depressed mood. However, when my hair starting falling out in clumps, my hands and eyelids starting swelling like crazy, and I was forgetting what I was saying mid sentence – I truly got alarmed.

I went to the doctor and demanded a blood test to assess my thyroid. With a family history of hypothyroidism I just had this feeling that that is what was going on with me. It was a gut instinct that compelled me to go to the doctors. Sure enough, a few days later they called me and said my TSH levels were high, indicating that I did in fact have hypothyroidism. “Ah ha, I knew it”, I thought. They ordered more blood work to be done to test my T3 and T4 levels. I can honestly say that I was shocked & somewhat defeated when my T3 and T4 were slightly abnormal but still in the standard range. My doctor explained that I did not actually have hypothyroidism and that we should look at other diagnoses. In a way, I wanted to be diagnosed with hypothyroidism – so I could get on medication, treat it, and start feeling better finally.

A later doctors appointment provided me with the diagnosis of subclinical hypothyroidism. In other words, the early stages of hypothyroidism and thyroid failure. Still, they didn’t want to treat my thyroid. Instead, they wanted to combat my depression and anxiety first, with hopes that some of my symptoms were relieved.

So far, my symptoms still remain. And I decided to take on a different approach. Thyroid medication is unnatural, expensive for a struggling grad student and right now, not an option for me. So Β – I’m trying a more holistic, natural approach. With further research, I’ve decided to increase my iodine intake with the use of an iodine and kelp supplement. The iodine that I purchased is Detoxadine (Dr. Group) Β and is a high quality iodine supplement.The kelp supplement that I purchased is Swanson brand. The two are being shipped now and I hope to start them right away, hoping that in a short amount of time I will feel a difference and my symptoms will be lessened or relieved.

To half marathon again? Or to not…

Last year in April I ran a half marathon. It was the day I found out my uncle would be passing away soon. Any day now, any minute, any second. He had stage four cancer so we knew the day would come – but we did not know was when.

Jeez, do I run it? Or do I go home and and be with my uncle and my family. My family urged me to run it because I had been training and it was something I really wanted to do. But I just couldn’t fathom the idea of not saying goodbye to my uncle over some race. My mind was made up that I was heading home & that running a half marathon would have to be crossed off my bucket list at another time. However, I ran it and I did it in his honor. My uncle John passed away the next day. The only thing that got me through that half marathon was the thought of him every single mile. The next day I got to say goodbye & I got to whisper in his ear that I had completed that half marathon in his honor. This year I am thinking of running that exact half marathon again. I would like to do it every year in his honor. But it is a huge commitment and a lot of training. With the writing of my masters thesis next semester and finishing up my degree, I’m just not sure there will be time. Suggestions? Should I run it or should I not. Only time will tell….!

Halloween week: day 5

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1) Nerds. My friend and I were nerds. I wore a purple dress and she wore a pink dress. We wore glasses and glued a cardboard cutout from a nerds box on us.
2) Biker. I wore a black tank, leather jacket (not pictured), Jean shorts & leather boots. I also had fake tattoos and a bandana.
3) Minnie Mouse. I’m obsessed with disney so naturally I chose to be Minnie Mouse πŸ™‚ I wore black leggings, a red tutu that I glued white dots onto for polka dots and a black shirt. I had ears & painted my nose.